human'kind'?

Sharing:  i was recently in the local gas station at the lake, buying some ingredients for a smores campfire, when 2 men my age behind me, took it upon themselves to say loudly, how the fat ass bitch in front of them in line should reconsider her purchases. Their laughter and jeers at my expense continued the whole entire time that i was in line in front of them, and they were purposely being loud enough so i could hear them. I froze in mortification, my face felt like it was melting off... not because i am in denial or because i was suddenly struck with the realization that i was fat or unattractive, i own a mirror ... but by the pure unkindness & mean spirits of some human beings. When i left the store & got in my car i drove as fast as i could away from there because i knew they would be emerging shortly after me, and because i knew i was going to cry... hard. 

I was right, WOW did i cry. I hate that i cried.  Not because i hate my fat self... because i really DON'T! I don't cry about my weight or hate skinny people. I am me! More than a couple people love me for me. These morons don't know me! I was mad at myself for not having a snappy come back or a humorous sarcasm to toss back at them like i would usually have in my day to day life. I usually toss out the self deprecating jokes to inform others that i am aware of my own obvious struggles. Much like a bald guy makes fun of his own head, or the shortest person (also me) makes short jokes. I am usually not one to be speechless. I was mad at myself for not saying SOMETHING or standing up to them. But i was, at least, glad i didn't cry in front of them. Somehow i think that's what the assholes were hoping for... to make me cry? I dont know!!

Also, i am not saying this to be any degree of high & mighty, but i prayed for them. I really did. And for some reason i felt the need to pray for their Mothers... because i felt sad for them! what miserable adults their sons became. I also thought, wow... these dummies probably have kids, those poor doomed children. I hope & pray their kids have a fat or non-fat Momma or grandma that will instill in them some kindness.

photographer-mode

wowza... have i ever been in photographer mode lately! i have 4 photography jobs this week alone! It's simply because the fall colors here in Minnesota are at their peak, and just beautiful. I love taking photos, but look forward to having more time to paint after things slow down. I love fall too!! (except for the box-elder bugs and Asian beetles)

 

 

bound to happen...

It was inevitable that it would happen eventually, but i feel terrible!! One of my shipments disappeared in the mail before it got to it's recipient in Canada! UGH! I feel horrible, and i hate that shipping mishaps could be a reflection on me. I filled out all the 'claims' paperwork and sent it from the USPS... but alas... it has not yet arrived 2 weeks later. I will forever, from now on, be getting a return receipt & tracking number each & every time. I am still holding out hope that the mail is just slow, and that i will hear eventually that the package arrived & the customer is happy with the contents. In the mean time.... i have a little tummy ache about it. :(

**UPDATE** The shipment showed up! there was a mix up with the customer, who had moved & couldn't get in touch with the room mates or something... in the end, the painting showed up safe & sound! YIPPEE